Mindful Mondays|Week 26: Zen

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

What better way to end Season One of all these Monday meditations than with Zen — which is a Japanese translation of the Sanskrit word meaning “meditation”. For us, we also recognize this word to mean peaceful, calm, enlightened, relaxed. The original word also has to do with simplicity, not worrying, awareness. So let’s play with those concepts today and find a moment of Zen.

Today if you are able, find a comfortable place to lie down, with feet either propped up or the knees bent slightly to keep any tension off the lower back. Whether sitting or standing or lying, put one hand on your chest cavity above your diaphragm and place the other right on or below your diaphragm in the stomach region. Take a nice cleansing inhale and let it out slowly on the exhale. Close your eyes when you’re ready.

For a few minutes of Zen, just lie here. Let your body get heavy and sink into the earth below you. Let your mind quiet itself. And notice your breath, which is always easier to focus on with your hands holding the movements of the body. Stay present in the moment without falling asleep. See if you can straddle the line between staying aware that you are lying here in this moment with the other side of consciousness where total relaxation can occur. Stay with both those realities, and just breathe. Just be Zen.

***

If you’ve got lost in thought and lost your sense of Zen, just come on back. Welcome your mind to anchor down into the breath, feel the sensations below your hands as your inhales and exhales flow, and keep your relaxation at peak calmness without losing your present awareness to your body.

***

That, my friends, is our Zen practice for today. Simple, peaceful, and unhurried. Just being, no doing. Alert but calm. That’s the practice. You nailed it. And if you want more, stay right here after my voice fades, and keep on in the Zen for as long as you want. You earned this; you deserve this. See you next season for more mindful moments together. Be well, Survivors.

Mindful Mondays|Week 25: Yield

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

It’s common for Trauma Survivors to struggle with intrusive thoughts, compulsions, addictions, obsessions, or maladaptive (once useful, now unnecessary) coping mechanisms. I find it comforting to remember that we can respect the purposes behind these things, and, without judgment, we can be compassionate with ourselves. It can be really healthy to explore and be curious about these types of thoughts and actions, just watching them and recognizing them, without yielding to them. Being aware is always step one in making any positive changes. For example, staying with a strong emotion or sensation is hard for the mind. It wants to distract you in order to protect you. There’s always room to observe why your thought or action is gnawing at your brain and see what it is trying to help you cope with. Just watching its pattern and the way it tries to manipulate you into complying can be useful data for you to break negative cycles and addictive behaviors with awareness.

A good practice is right here in this meditation space. Consider this a bootcamp for learning to not allow your mind to control you. Practicing mindfulness a few minutes each day is training your mind to pause to be present and teaching your thoughts that they are not in charge of you. You can sense things, feel things, think things, and get distracted by things, but, without yielding to their temptations, you can be aware that you moved away from your anchor and bring it right back. Just observe, recognize, and without judgment, re-focus. Let’s try it.

Make sure you are in a space where no external distractions will bother you. Feel your seat grounding you below. Allow your eyes to close or cast a soft gaze downward if that feels safer. Take a cleansing breath. Now find a part of your breath that is most obvious to you — the inhale sensation in the nostrils, the rise of your chest, the pressure expanding in your belly, or the pause in the middle of the inhale and exhale. Just stay steady on that as long as you can. Allow your mind to be here. You aren’t shutting it off; you are just choosing a focus and anchoring down into it. Thoughts will still arise; emotions may come looking for you. Let that be okay. Don’t yield to them; just notice they are there and then jump right back into focusing on the breath.

***

If you got lost in thought or sensation, no judgment. That’s part of the practice. In fact, that is the practice. Now that you know, focus back on your anchor breath, and let your mind settle into it as well.

***

If you are noticing intrusive thoughts or difficult emotions or obsessive-compulsive ideation, that’s okay. That’s what you are sitting here for, to notice and still not give in. Just blow it all away with your exhale and sink your mind back into the focus of your breath. Try this for one more moment.

***

How do you feel after not letting your mind control you? How do you feel not yielding to every whim of your body wanting to move or get up? Was it okay to stay presently focused on the breath instead of following a thought that would have turned into a movie? Do you notice any difference in the clarity of your mind right now?

The more you practice mindfulness, the more you are able to learn how to stay steady in your thoughts and not allow addictions or tricky emotions get the best of you. One moment at a time, one thought at a time. One practice session at a time. You did amazingly well!

When you are ready, open your eyes and root back into your body. Take this focused, unyielding, powerful self on back into your day. Stay well and strong and in charge.

Mindful Mondays|Week 24: Xenial

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

To get started today, try to find a really warm space where you feel gently held, quieted, and comforted. This may be your bed, in front of the fireplace, or a breakfast nook. Pick somewhere snuggly, in a space where you won’t be distracted. Find a relaxed posture but also an alertness so you won’t get too sleepy. Take a really slow, even breath. Try to find a balanced inhale and exhale. I recommend a five-count inhale, five-count exhale. Go ahead and try a few that feel good to you to bring some stability to your practice today.

***

Today we want to use this time to practice some inner hospitality. The word xenial means warm, welcoming, and hospitable. It defines the relationship between a host and their guest. Try to see if you can be really hospitable to anything that comes up during this time. Can you welcome the monkey mind of racing thinking, maybe even intrusive thoughts, or a difficult emotion? Can you play host/hostess to the guests that join you during this mindfulness practice? Try to find a peace within yourself so that you can help make comfortable whatever discomfort you find in the body or mind or spirit. Try it for a few minutes.

***

Are you finding unease in welcoming tough emotions? Are you struggling to be welcoming to a body sensation like a leg that fell asleep? If so, imagine yourself as the host of your whole being. Imagine each sensation, thought, emotion, feeling, and distraction to be your guest. They will all be temporary, I promise. The brain will lose interest in any sort of thing after not too long. So while these things come and visit you, try to conjure an image of you welcoming them into this home inside you. Give each passing one a generous and warm greeting. “Hello. I see you came for a visit.” “Thank you for coming to show me that today.” “I welcome your discomfort with open arms.” “Hello, my friend. Grab a cup of tea and come sit with me for a while.”

***

Before we close, try to clear out all those guests with a moment of focus on the breath, to center yourself back into your space and time and allow the host a moment of rest. Try a few more balanced breaths at whatever count feels comfortable to you. It’s a chance to extend some hospitality to the host for all the kindness you gave out to welcoming your guests. Just stay connected to the grounding, equal breath.

***

Welcome back from your journey of playing host. You did a wonderful job being xenial to all the things that rose up from within you. You were very kind and welcoming. Take that kindness with you as you open your eyes and go back into your day. Use this practice whenever you need a bit of space between you and your troubling circumstances, body aches, or spiritual fatigue. This xenial practice is here inside you for whenever you need it.

Mindful Mondays|Week 23: Watching the Watcher

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

To begin, find a comfortable and quiet space where you won’t be disturbed for a few minutes. Find a relaxed yet alert posture that you can maintain. Close your eyes to minimize distractions. Take a long, cleansing breath and find a calm, quiet attitude.

***

Inside this space in your brain, find your breath’s rhythm and follow it. It’s that simple. Watch the inhale as it rises and peaks. Watch the exhale as it falls and stills. Watch the inhale all the way to the peak and the exhale all the way to the stillness at the bottom of the breath.

***

Now for a few moments, can you be aware of the one watching as you watch your breath? See if you can zoom out to watch the watcher? Stay steady on yourself in your mind’s eye as you are the one watching your breath.

***

Can you zoom out even once more to find the watcher who is watching the watcher watching the breath? Can you allow your mind to get lost in the kaleidoscope of watching — all while focusing on the inhale and exhale from start to finish?

***

Today we tried this practice of watching the watcher. This is a method to keep the focus strongly on the breath, without losing the awareness of the present moment. You aren’t in the breath or in the watching. You are the breath, and you are the watching. Your awareness is the thing that’s allowing you to focus on whichever thing you choose — the anchor of the breath, the watching the watcher watch the breath, or any number of the outside focuses or the other watchers. This creates a zooming effect of focus. When you do this, you are training your mind to stay present to even the details zoomed in on the breath itself or zoomed out on whichever watcher you’d like. The universe abounds in opportunities of focus. Today you chose stillness and focused well on that for these minutes. Congratulate yourself on staying with it on a journey inward and outward and above and around.

***

When you’re ready, open your eyes and move watchfully back into your day. Be well, Survivors.

Mindful Mondays|Week 22: Validation

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

Start today by finding a comfortable space somewhere familiar to you. Let any last movements needed in your legs or neck or shoulders to squirm out. Sit with a tall spine but without tension. Imagine a string from the top of your head to the sky above holding you up. Feel into the support of your seat to feel grounded and feel into the posture to find a sense of alertness yet ease. Look around your space for just a moment to get a snapshot of the objects and colors around you. Ground into your body and its connection to the world around you. When you are ready and feel secure, close your eyes to shut out all the outside stimuli.

***

Now that you’ve allowed yourself into this inner realm of yours, what do you find in here? Do thoughts start racing? Are you still seeing the silhouetted memories of your outside room? Do you find a sensation in your body? Take a minute to just explore before we find an anchor. Anything that comes up, just acknowledge it. It has a valid space here. Any emotion, any tingling, any fantasy, any administrative thoughts — they are all valid in your inner realm. Try not to reject them but validate them. “I see you.” “Ah, here you are in my inner space, coming to find me.” “Thank you for showing me that.” Give that a try for a moment.

***

Now that you’ve taken a moment to validate your inner realm and all its immediate needs and wants — let’s ask this wild canvas of thoughts and feelings to clear off for a few moments. You gave it time to be heard and validated. Now you’d like these things to validate your meditation moment with peace and stillness. Take three cleansing, deep belly breaths and come to a quietness in your spirit.

***

This time that you set aside to still yourself is valid. The need and want is valid. The quietness is valid. The desire for peace and expansion is valid. I hear you. I see you. This is the work. Find your breath exactly as it is. No need to try to change its pattern or rhythm. Just follow your breath and let your time be precious.

***

Come back now to your mind and thoughts and feelings and body. Thank them for validating your time spent with your focus off of them and on your own inner peace. Both things have validity. Both things are priceless. Before you go back to the whims of your brain, take another cleansing breath, and thank your mind for giving you space to be present. Anytime the demands of the outside world or your own inner self become too much — just pause and validate their concerns, and then ask for a little space to just be for a moment. The ebb and flow is a beautiful relationship between the Doing and the Being of life.

***

When you’re ready, you can open your eyes. Step peacefully back into your day. Feel validated for this time and come back whenever you would like. Be well, survivors.

Mindful Mondays|Week 21: Uncover

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

When you slow down and take time to be in your own space, inside your own mind and body, in a relaxed environment — you tend to discover some things your brain is trying to work out or complete or solve. This often can happen when we lay down at night. When the body stops and the space gets dark and quiet, your brain can finally have your full attention and start its laundry list of things it’s wanting you to work out from the day, about your coworkers or spouse, the schedule, planning for the future, and worrying about the past. This ends up being an unhealthy time for your mind to start chattering because sleep is of utmost importance. Many survivors struggle with sleep disruptions and insomnia because the brain is using the space to work through everything it has ever been through, and it takes so long to calm its overactive nervous system.

If this is you, you probably find the same thing happens when you hit the meditation pillow where, for some, taming the monkey mind seems unreasonably difficult. That’s very normal, actually. If being here every day for ten minutes is the one time of day you are able to sacrifice and carve out as alone, quiet, relaxed, dark, peaceful space, then your experiences with monkey mind are extra common.

So — today is an unconventional practice just for you. I want to honor you for taking the time to be here, and I want you to try to be mindful inside of your non-stop brain. We aren’t going to focus on the breath or body or an anchor. Now is the time to let your mind run freely. What this mindfulness practice today is to watch it happen. Give your brain an open field for full frolicking mode — just try to not let your mind get completely lost in thought. Try to watch your thoughts, from a non-judgmental seat like a tourist would watch monkeys swinging from tree to tree in the jungle. Try to notice your body sensations while thinking. Be extra aware of emotions that arise while the thoughts jump around you. Follow the thoughts to see how far into oblivion they can go, and then chuckle to yourself as you notice the absurdity of the movie playing out in your head. Maybe there is a serious issue that comes to your mind, and you can just follow the journey the brain goes on trying to make sense of it. Maybe a difficult emotion is going to arise; just watch the story is that is causing it. Wriggle along with the storyline to see if your brain can work itself out. If you lose contact with the space, sensations, or your point of view, notice that and come back to focusing on the thoughts drifting through. Let’s allow this time to be the creative playground for your mind to get lost in wonder today.

Close your eyes and see what you uncover in your mind for a few minutes.

***

Welcome back. Open your eyes and wiggle your fingers and toes. Reground into the room you are in. 

When your brain had your full attention, what did it uncover? Is there some vision or goal you need to go write down like a dream journal? Is there a pressing matter you need to add to your to-do that you had been forgetting? Did you uncover a new perspective to a trauma trigger that you had earlier this week? Did you solve an argument you and your partner had?

Whatever you uncovered is precious. Treat it like a newly discovered gem. Your brain created an idea, calculated stuff, organized an issue, or talked you onto or off of a ledge — now you know what it wanted to tell you while you were busy all day long. Yet you allowed the thinking to uncover itself in a process of mindfulness — you stayed present to your body and emotions and the world around you without getting too swept away.

If you found this very helpful, maybe you could find a space to add in a 5–10-minute monkey mind session throughout the day. Meditation is to help improve mental focus and to stay present in the moment. Today we wanted to see what it would look like without a settled focus, just for fun. If your mind was going crazy with delight for you allowing it to flutter around its playground, perhaps a few minutes of that right before you begin a meditation practice would help settle the monkeys so you can work on staying present in the moment or focused on an anchor.

This is a new tool for you to play with as you become more aware of what your mind, body, and spirit all want to uncover for you. This was great and important work. Be well, survivors.

Mindful Mondays|Week 20: Thinking

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

The mind is a complex place. The brain is made up of billions of nerve cells. The brain loves to think and work on our behalf. Even when we think we have stopped “thoughts”, the brain never actually completely stops doing what it needs to do. Beyond thinking, the brain is responsible for memory, the five senses, emotions, and all the regulation of our entire body. If the computer system breaks down, everything falls apart. So we can honor our brain by allowing thought. Channeling ideas, using thinking when most needed, calming the reacting parts, and staying on top of looping thought patterns is where mindfulness is helpful. We will never actually stop thinking, so trying to do so will only bring frustration and more worry. Meditation is about not resisting the brain’s magical thinking powers. It’s about allowing whatever is there to be there, acknowledging it, and then redirecting. This process, over and over and over again, is a mindfulness practice. That’s where you’ve found yourself today. Let’s give this a try.

Find a comfortable, quiet, relaxed space where you won’t be distracted. Take a cleansing breath. Close your eyes when you are ready. You are now inside the blank space of your mind where anything can happen.

You may notice sensations in your body, the urge to get up and jiggle around, feeling too hot or too cold, hunger, thirst, rapid fire thoughts, worries, a sense of panic, boredom, arousal, decompression from the day, coordination of your schedule, the long to-do list, fears, old grief from losing a loved one, or anything else the mind can think of to distract you. First thing to do here is to be okay with any and all of those things I just listed. Recognize this is the brain’s job. We are not going to try to stop the brain’s activity. We aren’t going to try to take away its magical powers.

Ground down into the seat below you and start to find a place in your body where you most feel your ever-constant breath. The cool air in the nostrils, the upper lip as warm exhales pass by, your chest or belly rising, or your rib cage expanding. We’ll call that the breath anchor. Stay with this focus point for as long as you can. When you get lost in a feeling, emotion, sensation, worry, thought, story, fantasy, or anything that’s outside of the focus on the breath, just recognize it. You can even tell yourself “There went my brain, working hard again.” Then gently, without judgment, just come back to the breath.

***

Did you get swept away downstream with the ever-so-long list of things you ‘should’ be doing? Did your body convince you to start scratching an itch? Are you planning your future child’s wedding again? All that is fine. Just come back. “That’s just my brain doing a good job,” you can say. Focus back on the breath and just stay with it as long as you can.

***

Where is your mind right now? Were you able to stay anchored a little longer this time? Did your brain come back in to do more of its good work? Great! Thank it, and then patiently return its focus on your breath and just breathe.

***

Each time you find yourself floating away like a feather, that’s the practice we call mindfulness. Congratulate yourself for noticing you got lost in thought, and then come on back. That’s how we strengthen the brain’s mindfulness capacity, over and over again. Let’s keep going for just another moment.

***

You did a great job today. Your brain went on thinking, as it does, and you kept on bringing it back, like a great guru of mindfulness. Be proud of the work you put in and continue bringing yourself back to the present moment throughout the day whenever you notice that your brain has taken over again. Nothing here to be upset about; the brain just loves to think. Allow it; acknowledge it. Be mindful of it as you move kindly back into your day. That’s the practice, and you did amazing work. Until next time, be well, survivors.

Mindful Mondays|Week 19: Support

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

Mindfulness is a great support to trauma recovery. The art of learning to support yourself, allowing the universe to support your healing, and bringing in safe people to add to your team of winning support — these are all highly important in sustaining wellness as you walk your recovery journey. Today, we’ll focus on some of these internal and external supports. Let’s get started.

Choose a meditation spot today that brings your body a good amount of support. A favorite chair, laying on the floor or ground with your knees bent or a bolster under them, or maybe sitting on a meditation pillow but with a support wall behind your back. We want today to be a couple minutes where your body can wholeheartedly feel braced so it can really hunker down and also hold up but without much effort needed. Take a cleansing breath to allow your nervous system to relax. Close your eyes if that feels safe.

***

As you start to move away from outside noise and distractions and become absent from internal thoughts and worries — can you get a solid sense for the ground supporting you from below? At the same time, think for a moment about how the gravity of the atmosphere and the weight of your body is holding you down.

***

Now take a moment to concentrate on the immune system inside you that is supporting your overall health, the heart that is beating to keep you alive, and the breath that works effortlessly on your behalf.

***

Imagine a few things or people in your day-to-day life that support your life, health, or well-being. This maybe is a pet, a nice co-worker, a neighbor who is friendly, a community you belong to, your favorite walking trail by your house, a steady income, healthy meals, your morning shower, or anything that brings you a feeling of content and connection to the good parts of life.

***

Now dig a bit deeper by expanding out to the universal goodness that supports your well-being. Perhaps imagine a morning commute with very little traffic, the crisp autumn air in the mountains, the sunshine beaming down on you for warmth, or anything that Mother Nature provides serendipitously to make your life have moments of pleasure and calm.

***

Finally, look deeply inward to yourself for all the ways you are a support to you. All the ways you assist in thriving especially in the dark times of your trauma recovery. Self-compassion, self-care, self-love, journaling, mindfulness, a good night sleep, healthy choices, utilizing boundaries, following your gut instincts, learning to trust in a new relationship, and all the ways that you commit to your healing, devote yourself to this trauma work, and accomplish inner peace.

***

Before you come back fully to the room and your surroundings, take a snapshot of all these people, places, and things that come together to support your recovery. Breathe in the goodness of these concepts and trust you are well supported. Maybe you realize there are some areas that were harder to contemplate support than others. Maybe you think you are ready for professional support. Maybe you can rest in having thought about massive support and take a moment of gratitude. Wherever you are today, release your mind back to the space you’re in and allow your eyes to flutter open. With a sense of thankfulness, move carefully back into your well-supported day.

Mindful Mondays|Week 18: Retreat

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

Can your mind become a retreat? Can your own body be your safe haven? Let’s give that a try today. Go ahead and find your most perfect spot, in a position you like and can maintain and not fall asleep. Give yourself a little cuddle; remind yourself you are safe and well. Look around at your surroundings and see if you can imagine this being the most amazing retreat location your mind can conjure. What if all the piles of laundry were sandcastles? What if the broken end table had your favorite hot drink sitting upon it? What if the bland whitish walls were scenes of epic mountains sprawled out in front of you? What if this room was your very own private escape, and your body was there for all the sensations? If you can think it, you can create it. Soak it in; drink it down. Let out a sigh and close your eyes when you are ready.

***

Settle into your perfect retreat and feel grounded in your own skin. Can you allow your thoughts to tuck away next to you like in a cove off your lounge chair? Is it okay to just be with yourself right now? Can you allow your mind to pick a point of focus and just stay with it?

***

If your thoughts left their cove and have invaded your mind again, that’s okay. Remind your brain this is your safe haven for a few minutes and that all thoughts are welcome back shortly. Then just simply return to your focal point.

***

If you need extra help concentrating, try finding your breath and staying with it more closely by counting your inhales and exhales. Inhale, pause, exhale, one. Inhale, pause, exhale, two. Inhale, pause, exhale, three. Keep going until your concentration has gone deep enough to forget about your worries for a few more moments.

***

Welcome back to your reality and your body and your piles of laundry and missed phone calls. Congratulate yourself on coming here to your retreat today, even just for a few minutes of a safe, quiet place. Allow this space that you created to go with you wherever you take off to today; come back anytime your mind needs a bit of a retreat.

Mindful Mondays|Week 17: Quietness

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

Sometimes allowing quietness can be triggering for trauma survivors. When it’s quiet, you can hear your heart and head much more loudly. That may not seem like a positive choice because what’s in your body or mind may scare you or worry you. In the solace without noise, you may be confronted with some problematic thoughts or painful emotions. While that’s really common, it’s also totally normal and okay. Staying for a moment with those, you can then find an anchor like a soft gaze on the floor to focus on or listening to the rhythm of your heartbeat. Your soul may muster back up more of those thoughts and emotions, but you can sit with them again for a brief period and then go back to your focal point. You can watch the difficulty rise up, recognize how it shows up in your body, be okay with it, and then choose silence again by directing your brain back to its anchor — such as the breath or the pattern of rain tinkering on the window. It’s inevitable that when you slow down, still yourself, settle in, and pause — that the quiet around will be a lot for your brain to manage at first. Your mind wants to think, plan, worry, figure things out. Your heart wants to express the grief, anxiety, sadness, or joy that it feels. That’s what they were built to do. Anything that comes up is okay. It’s information for you to make note of so you can explore with curiosity later, and then to gently guide your brain back to its anchor and ask it to focus again. In this quietness, you can find peace between the balance of internal movement from thoughts, feelings, sensations, tingles, vibrations to internal quiet of stillness, solace, calm. Let’s try this today.

Whatever location and body position you’ve found yourself in for today’s meditation is wonderful. Stay there and settle down by feeling the weight of your body on the ground below you. Nestle your spirit into the safety of your body, this space, and this time. Close your eyes and search around for the anchor that feels right for you. Maybe a vision in your mind, your breath, or a noise around you. Whatever you choose, just get quiet and then let that quietness come like a blanket over you.

***

When your thoughts and emotions rise up, let them rise. Don’t fight them or force them. Just watch them come in to try to make noise, get curious about them, recognize where you feel them in your body, and then just recenter your mind back on the quietness of your anchor.

***

If you are lost in sensation or worry, that’s okay. Be kind to your feelings and mental state, and gently draw yourself back into the solace. If you need, you can even give your soul a soft “shhhh” sound to lull it into the quiet rest. Ground into your anchor and be still.

***

Coming back to your body now; feel the space around you and your body in that space. Slowly open your eyes when you are ready.

Entering back into the noise of the world around you, remember that whenever you need a moment of quiet, you have that inside you anytime you wish to return.

Mindful Mondays|Week 16: Pause

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

Let it be said first that however you are showing up today is perfectly wonderful. Your true self, whether it’s messy, tired, energetic, calm, or rushed, is welcome here today. Find a space somewhere comfortable where you won’t be distracted. You can sit, stand, or lay down — based on your body’s needs today. If you are more energetic, perhaps standing is a good form for meditation today. If you are very calm and feel it best to root down into your favorite chair, that’s wonderful too. Choose a place that makes you feel at ease but alert. Let these next few moments serve as a pause. A pause on all the things you must do. A pause on that nagging sense of perfectionism. A pause on the passions of your heart. Let this be a pause on all that ails you and delights you. Find some neutrality with the world for a couple minutes if you are able.

Close your eyes when you are ready and breath in the atmosphere around you. Allow sounds to fade in the background. Give permission for the ground below you to metaphorically liquify. The aim here is to detach the senses and feel internally into your body. Take three long, slow breaths and root down into your inner being.

***

Now with the attention draw inward toward your spirit, stay focused on something natural in your body. Pick something you can sense but not quantify. Your breath is a good anchor, and so can be your heartbeat, blood flowing through your veins, tummy rumbles, or tingling nerves. Once you’ve chosen, just stay with that focus for a few minutes to pause yourself in this space — right here, right now.

***

Congratulations yourself on taking this time to pause by going inward. Reconnect your body and mind back to the outside senses and readjust to the space you are in. Feel your body touching the support surface. Allow your eyes to flutter open and absorb light. Smell the air deeply. Now you are welcome to move peacefully back into the rest of your day.

Mindful Mondays|Week 15: Oscillation

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

Before we begin, let’s get settled down into a chair or on the floor, in a tall, seated position with a nice long spine that creates an alertness and yet is not rigid. Before we close our eyes, let’s take a moment to slowly move our head from side to side. Looking as far to the right as you can, take a nice long exhale. On the inhale, come back to the center. On the next exhale, look as far as you can to the left. Inhale again back to the center, and on the next exhale, lower your chin to your chest. Feel a nice, opening stretch on the back of your neck. We’re going to do the side-to-side motion a couple more times just to loosen the neck. Let’s get familiar with the room and the surroundings as well as stretch out those neck muscles. Oscillate your head very slowly from the right and left a couple of more times on your own. Settle back to the center when you’ve done a few more.

***

When you’re ready and if it’s safe to do so, go ahead and close your eyes. Take a moment to feel the looseness in your neck. Now, focus your attention inward to the breath. Get a good sense of grounding here. Feel your body as a whole breathing in and breathing out. Allow whatever comes up to come up. Maybe it is thoughts come in or something you know you need to get done or something you are worrying or stressing about. Maybe it’s an emotion — a good one or a more difficult one to handle. Let those just come in — the thoughts, feelings, emotions, or any sensations. They can come in and you can go back to the focus on the breath. No need to stay on one thing. Just allow a nice flow. Allow the thoughts to come in, to rise, and to fall. Allow any emotion to bubble to the surface and watch as it falls back as you refocus on your breath.

***

As your thoughts and feelings rise in you like a wave, just imagine they are pulling you to the left and to the right. Just like your neck, the oscillation of a fan is sitting on one centered joint. This is moving with ease, not restraining or restriction. It’s okay if something pulls you to the left or pulls you to the right. Can you find some balance here? Allow things to sway you nice and gently, evenly, from side to side — but always returning to the center.

***

I wonder if it’s okay here to have pendulating emotions? If you are remaining on a centered post and an emotion is bringing you from the left to the right, is there choppiness there? Is there a high swing or low swing? If it’s too fast, it can start to feel uncentered. A nice, smooth oscillation allows there to be expansion from one side to the other and with a smoothness, a cadence, and a controlled rhythm. It will always pass back through the center. Can that be true for you today? Thoughts may sway you wildly from side to side, but if they have to pass through your center, can you find that gentle cadence? Can you be okay with the pendulation? Can you find a safe, grounded space amidst the pulls and pushes of the world? Let’s stay here another moment.

***

Let’s come back to the body, sitting in this centered, grounded space — alert but not rigid, relaxed and restful but focused. Allow that balance to a place you can return to when the ebb and flow, the push and pull, the swaying of the world gets to be too much. Allow this space of oscillation to carry you through any chaos or disruption today. Be well.

Mindful Mondays|Week 14: Nature

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

Today we are going to work on a visualization technique. I’ve chosen the background track to my vocals to mimic nature sounds, but if you are able to get outside and perhaps sit by a brook, the shore of the ocean, or on a log in the forest — this would be ideal. Today we are going to use the healing power of nature to calm our spirit and reconnect to the world around us.

Find a comfortable spot, whether in nature or in your usual meditation space. Settle down and feel the ground supporting you like a foundation. Give yourself a moment to acclimate into the setting. Look around for something beautiful, familiar, or appealing.

***

If you are out in nature, keep your eyes open so you can use the place you found as a visual anchor for today’s meditation. Find a solace in this natural setting that you’ve found and visually explore without moving around. If you are inside, close your eyes and take a minute to conjure up a beautiful scene of nature that you’ve been to, a place you want to visit, or use creativity to imagine one you’ve never even seen before.

***

Your mind is playing with all the textures and colors of the nature scene that you are in or visualizing. Pay close attention to those colors, the shapes, and the textures. Notice as much detail about the objects around you as you can.

***

Now let’s shift the focus to listening to the sounds around you or that you hear playing on this meditation guide. Listen to each intonation of my voice, the animal or insect sounds, the water flowing, or the silence that may be surrounding you in your special space.

***

Now let’s breathe in the smells of this real or imaginary world you’re sitting in. The pine, the salt water, the fresh mud, the cool air. Take some slow, long, deep breaths — not to focus on the breathing but to breathe in the smells that come into your nostrils as you inhale.

***

Finally, hone in on the feeling that this place gives you. Maybe you feel your worries melting away, a sense of adventure calling you, or the ease of life as the air, creatures, or water pass by. Really ground into your heart space and find several moments of pleasure here in this safe environment. Notice that you are a vital part of this earth, that the dirt around you is life-giving, and that every living thing you can see if here because of the elements.

***

Nature is a place that holds a lot of balance. It does this not by being perfectly harmonious by happenchance. It is aligned with itself despite the ebb and flow of weather conditions, climates changing, seasons shifting, the life cycle of birth and death all around, threats of predators, sometimes sparse and sometimes plentiful food availability, factors of human interruption, and many other challenges it faces. Nature isn’t just naturally balanced; it becomes balanced even in the rocking of the world and finds the stillness inside of the storm. What doesn’t kill it makes it stronger. Its viability comes from its vulnerability. It stays flexible, moving with the wind, shifting with the seasons, becoming wild or calm based on the days weather. It needs both sunshine and rain to be nourished. It doesn’t fret when a harsh winter comes; it just wriggles back into its winter form and waits. It celebrates the warm months with flowers, freshness, popping colors, and melodies of birdsongs. Nature knows not the future, but panics about it none. It is willing to adapt to conditions, to wait out the sometimes cruelty of the Mother, and to bud when it is safe to do so. It accepts its surroundings and makes peace with the living things around it. We can take these lessons and store them in our hearts. We learn harmony, glory, and vivacity from nature. Let’s take a moment to thank this living space or imagined creation in our mind. Be truly grateful for its wisdom and its ability to connect us with our inner being by disconnecting us from the crazy world we live in. We can utilize nature whenever we need space to just watch the reality of harmony and admire its imperfect perfections.

Come to a close now by giving this gratitude back to nature, reconnecting to your own body, and coming back to the space around you. Take a deep breath, and move lovingly back into your day.

Mindful Mondays|Week 13: Mindful Moment

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

Today is more of a classic meditation, so let’s settle into a seated position. A posture of restfulness but alertness. Before you close your eyes, take a moment to ground yourself in the room or space you are in. Gently gaze at the objects in front of you … to your left … to the right … and above you. Try to notice the dimensional space surrounding you and feel a sense of security in this area that you chose to meditate in today. Now let’s close the eyes and take a few centering breaths to settle into this moment.

***

Right now, right here, in this mindful moment, there is nothing to do, nowhere to go. No productivity or creativity is needed, neither any special talents, or anything that needs thinking through. No worry is helpful here. All this is is a few minutes of following your breath, observing yourself breathe, staying in the moment trying to notice when thought sweeps you away, and then coming back to the breath once you realize. There is no judgment here. Your mind is thinking because that’s what the mind does. It’s doing what it knows how. What you are doing here for a few minutes is asking your brain to focus on one sole thing: the breath. This can be a hard task. The practice is in the noticing your mind when it drifts away into thought and then bringing it gently back. That’s what meditation is. Meditation does not mean you can stay with the breath the longest; it means you can catch the wandering and bring it back — over and over and over.

***

Where is your mind now? Have you lost track of your breath? Just realize it. Note “thinking” to yourself and just come back to focusing only on your breath.

***

We aren’t trying to change the breath or manipulate it in any way. We are just sitting in our seat of observance, watching ourselves breathe. Following the breath like a game of “follow the leader” — watching each inhale, the pause, and each exhale. Notice the length of the breath. Feel the soft moment of pause between breaths. Just create a moment of peace focusing on this breath and this breath and this one.

***

If you’ve slid into thinking, that’s okay. Note to yourself “thinking” and gently recalibrate your mind back to the focal point of the breath.

***

Today was a training practice — a more standard version of mindfulness. Allowing your brain to get lost in thought, noticing it, and bringing it back again and again — that is meditation. Mindfulness doesn’t have to be fancy or difficult. It’s just a few minutes of space to allow your mind a rest — a space to not have to worry, fuss, task, plan, fix, or calculate. It’s a mindful moment in a busy world in your busy day to just sit and remember you are a human who breathes. Come back to this meditation anytime you need a moment of mindfulness.

Mindful Mondays|Week 12: Lazy River

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

Let’s set sail on a lazy river. If it’s comfortable and safe, today’s meditation is best while lying down. If you aren’t able, try to get in the most comfortable place where you won’t be distracted. Either way, try to shift into place so that you can find complete stillness but still stay alert.

Allow your body to weigh very heavy and close your eyes when you are ready. Feel the support below you and allow your muscles a moment to relax. Take four slow deep breaths as your body comes to rest upon the earth.

***

The word “lazy” can be really triggering for over-achievers, over-doers, perfectionists, rushed people, heavy work-loaded folks, those suffering with hyperactivity, over-thinkers, and those who have a chaotic energy in their minds. These words also often describe developmental trauma survivors, those raised with abusive or oppressive parents, and those cultures of high-achieving family work values. Although every human’s brain has a hard time when first practicing focus and mindfulness; it can be extra challenging for trauma brains to allow us the space to just sit. This may seem lazy or selfish to take time just to be with your breath, watch yourself breathing, repeat a mantra, or any other mundane meditation practice.

I wonder if we can reframe our thinking about being “lazy”; what if we called this productive rest? What if this was a decompression time that actually allowed more space for purposeful focus on work and tasks later? What if this was a place where your brain got defragmented and re-organized? Tomorrow we are going to talk about the maze of the trauma recovery journey. Can this be a pause moment in that healing work? Can meditation be that minute of calm in the storm of life? Productive rest is good for your mind, body, and spirit.

Let’s try this together. Let’s just lay here. No breathwork today, no mantra. Nothing to do; even if you have a million things to do, none of them are to get done now. This is your lazy river. Mentally grab a supportive inflatable, and allow the warm waters with gentle current to just float you down its mazy path. It’s twisting and turning, but so slowly and calmly that you barely notice the shift. You can watch the clouds and drift along without a single care in the world — because right now none of them matter. Just be.

***

If your mind instinctively went back to thoughts and worries, that’s okay. Just place yourself back on your float and set sail again down your lazy river. Watch the clouds, feel the sunshine, dip your toes, and drift.

***

You’re doing so well that I wonder if there’s space for you to drift along for just one more minute? Would it be productively restful to stay on your raft and take a final peaceful moment on your river?

***

Welcome back to the room and the space around you. Feel your body on the not-river ground. Wiggle your fingers and toes, and you can open your eyes when you are acclimated. What’s beautiful is this productive rest just gentled your mind, so it’s actually better equipped to handle the twisty turns of the day with more peace and clarity. Remember you can come to your lazy river whenever you need a safe space to just float and have some un-lazy rest.

Mindful Mondays|Week 11: Kindness, Find Us

Author Note: If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

If you have been practicing mindfulness for a while, you are familiar with loving-kindness meditations. If you struggle with those, you aren’t alone. And, also, don’t worry, because today we aren’t going to do one of those. I’m not going to ask you to be kind or say kind things to anyone or yourself. Let’s get started.

Take a really comfortable seat, maybe even lying down today. Pick a spot that, if you can, is in a different location from where you usually meditate. Try to change the vibe a little bit.

Keep your eyes open for this part. Let’s start by taking three deep breaths with some head/neck rolls. It will look like this — start with your chin to your chest. Take one inhale and exhale to open the spine. On your next inhale, roll your head slowly to the right, all the way back so you are looking at the ceiling or sky, and follow through all the way back down to the chin to position. As you exhale, roll completely the opposite way, ending with your chin back down toward chest. Let’s try three complete inhale and exhale rolls in this way.

***

Now let’s settle into the ground and close your eyes if that feels safe. Place a hand over your chest, around the area of your sternum. Place your palm down so that you can feel your heartbeat. Let’s take a minute to focus on just that heartbeat inside our chest. Feel its rhythm; get familiar with its pulse; trust its steadiness.

***

Today, I want you to imagine that ever-steady heartbeat as your personal kindness. I believe each of us has a part inside that is called our Self-Kindness part. No matter how distracted we are, it’s still in there, buried in your chest, pumping along. Maybe moments you are not active with self-care, it gets a bit sluggish. When you are exercising your Kindness part, it is pumping strong and loudly. When you sit quietly, you can feel it, and even better you can feel it with your hand as a tool. Sometimes it takes a bit of silence, yet still sometimes it will palpitate when it needs attention. I think it’s really important to recognize you have a Self-Kindness part. Instead of a typical loving-kindness mantra, let’s change the prayer today to: Kindness, find us. We can speak to this Kindness part and ask it to join us in this meditation. We want the self-kindness, but there’s no rush or push to force it. Sometimes you do need to fake it til you make it, but today I’d like us to try the gentle back door. Let’s tell our Kindness part that we know it’s there. We see it; we want and need it. Ware open to it visiting us and gracing us with its presence. Give is a try with me:

Kindness, find us.

Kindness, find us.

Kindness, find us.

Kindness, we know you live inside us and are ever-available to us. Teach us to call on you more, especially in our times of self-criticism. Remind us with small palpitations, minor nudgings, that you are ever-ready to greet us and ground us in love and self-compassion.

Kindness, find us.

Kindness, find us.

Kindness, find us.

Let’s come back to the space around us, sounds, and our body. Take a moment to be thankful for your Self-Kindness part. With one last deep breath, you can open your eyes. Let Kindness find you throughout your day. Until next time, be well.

Mindful Mondays|Week 10: Jubilation

Author Note* If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

In today’s mindfulness practice, we are going to talk about celebrating our trauma recovery wins. If you are feeling stressed or overwhelmed, this practice may be difficult today. It may also be just what you need. Either one is okay. Just do your best, and maybe you’ll be able to try this again at another time in your journey. Just sitting today and spending time focusing inward is a win.

Let’s get started. Find a comfortable place where you won’t be distracted. Close your eyes if that feels safe. Settle down into your sit bones and feel the support of the ground or chair beneath you. Take a few calming breaths to find a good center.

***

Jubilation is a feeling of triumph. It’s even beyond Joy because it’s a special type of rejoicing and cheer that comes from a victory, good news, or something successful. In our trauma recovery journey, often the healing looks like “5 steps forward, 3 steps back” then “2 steps forward, 2 back” then “6 steps sideways and 2 steps diagonal”. There is no straight path to recovery. We’ve talked before about the layering effect that trauma placed on us, which means there is a layering pattern to removing that and finding wellness. With that said, it’s very important to make room for celebration when you do have even small wins along the way. The more you are able to praise yourself for tiny steps, the more your brain starts to rewire with that jubilant positive reinforcement.

So for today, are you able to think of something in the recent few days or weeks for which you can find jubilation? This may be a healthy decision you made or a boundary you stuck with. Maybe you recognized a trigger reaction, paused, and chose a different response. Perhaps you did some self-care, said ‘no’ to someone who was demanding something of you, or a therapy appointment you made. These are all those small victories in our healing path that we must not take for granted. Allow yourself, just for a few moments if you are able, to recognize the little hurdle you jumped, and find a few minutes of jubilation.

***

Maybe you are thinking about something that you are particularly proud of. Can you find a smile to match your happiness? Are you able to congratulate yourself?

***

Maybe you have been able to think of a lot of accomplishments recently. That’s something to really find pleasure in. Go ahead and tell yourself what a great job you are doing. Let your gladness run over. Don’t be shy to relish in your successes.

***

Now let’s take just another moment to find our breath. Come back from the jubilant party in your head and back into your body. Observe your breath; calm the rhythm if you got excited. Slow your heart rate with smooth exhales.

***

Welcome back — to your body, to the room, to this environment, to noises around you. This practice can go with you every day. At any moment that you become aware of a small shift in your trauma responses, a small win of trading harmful coping skills with new healthy ones, a small choice to talk to your coach or therapist, or a new relationship being built — each of these things are to be celebrated and to take pride in. Taking the time to allow yourself a Jubilation Moment will help reward your brain which will product more recovery victories!

Mindful Mondays|Week 9: Inquisitiveness

*Author Note* If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
 Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

Let’s get ready to have a few minutes of mindfulness together. Sit comfortably with a tall spine but a relaxed posture. Place your hands gently on your lap or knees so that you can feel your hands resting comfortably. For this practice, before anything else, let your mind know that we are going to get curious about it today; we are going to do some self-inquiry. Sometimes the mind needs a little heads up about what the game plan is. For trauma survivors, structure and preparedness allows us to relax more into a situation. Just gently let your brain and body know that’s the plan for today.

…

Now that our mind is on board with us, let’s really let gravity settle us firmly on the ground or chair below. Close the eyes if that feels good to you, or you can use a soft gaze at the ground in front of you. This just helps minimize distractions. Take a cleansing breath and sink down into this space and time.

…

First thing to notice is that inside this body, at this moment, just sitting here being, with your eyes closed or gazing down, you are the only one in this moment with yourself. I like to even tell myself, in my mind, “Okay now. It’s just us in here.” That may sound a little silly, but I’ll give you a moment if you want to try it.

…

Now that it’s just you, and you are aware that it’s just you — go ahead and shift your focus to your breath. Just for a few moments, try to keep your attention adhered right to your breath. Follow it wherever it goes, in whatever rhythm, pace, length. Just observe it and notice yourself breathing.

…

Now let’s get a little inquisitive. 
 How did your mind like being told you were going to do some self-introspection today?
 How did it feel to close your eyes and settle down into yourself? 
 Was it silly to talk in your head to the Self in your head? 
 Did you feel a bit meta? Did your inside Self answer you? 
 Were you able to stay with your breath or was your mind quite noisy today? 
 Did you find yourself analyzing the breath instead of just watching it? 
 What was your body’s response to sitting so still with your eyes closed? 
 Are you feeling anxious or fidgety like you want to get up? Is your to-do list taunting you? 
 Did you get sleepy and mellow and have a hard time tracking your breaths? 
Are you willing and able to think on these inquiries for a few moments?

…

When life gets a bit chaotic, a few moments of self-to-self inquisitiveness can lead you on a path to the deep issues happening inside. If something goes terribly wrong and you feel an emotion but can’t identify it, you can take a pause wherever you are and ask yourself how you are doing. At those times when the busyness of the day is creating overwhelm, you can gather your thoughts one by one and ask your mind to sit and talk to you for a bit. You can use inquisitiveness to see where in your body you are storing any stress. You can get quiet and curious about why you are feeling frustrated on a day when things are going pretty well. Remember, if you are a trauma survivor, your body and brain have been remembering stress and pain for years. Sometimes your pain just wants to be heard. You may find yourself running from errand to errand and lose track of the fact that you haven’t eaten yet that today, or you are feeling physically tired and need a rest. And sometimes it’s more than that. Your mind wants to let you in on what it has been holding onto. The more you do self-inquiry, the more your mind and body will start to trust you, and they will be more willing to share with you how they feel and what they need from you.

Give yourself one last, delicious drink of a deep breath. Go back to that feeling of your hands resting in your lap. Maybe you notice those hands now — feeling cold, warm, stiff, or itchy. If you took several minutes just examining your own hands, they would have many things to say to you. “I need lotion.” “I need to wiggle.” “I’m cold.” The same concept works for your heart and your mind. You can become inquisitive about your inner being and get curious about what’s really going on in there anytime you want. After all, in there, it’s just you.

When you’re ready, open your eyes. Wiggle those fingers and toes. Let your body and brain know that you are done with this sit, but that you desire to have more private sessions as a regular practice. Thank them for participating in your meditation today. Enjoy the rest of your day and be well.

Mindful Mondays|Week 8: Hope

*Author Note* If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

Begin by finding a quiet space to sit with no distractions just for a few minutes. Sit comfortably but alertly with a spine that is straight and supportive. Take a nice long slow deep breath to help your mind recognize that we are sitting for some mindfulness now. Get any last wiggles out of your fingers and toes. Slowly roll your head from side to side or in circles or looking left and right. Whatever helps bring you to a place of stillness.

…

If it’s safe to do, close your eyes. To calm your mind, spend a few moments just watching your breath. Find a focus point of your inhale and exhale — perhaps the rise and fall of your belly, the cool air going in and warmer air coming out of your nostrils. Just place your attention somewhere inside or around your body that helps you stay anchored to the present moment.

…

It’s completely normal to have been swept away by thoughts or worries or fantasies. Just take another slow deep breath, and without judging yourself come right back to the focus point of your breath and body.

…

We humans are known for being preoccupied with thinking, listening, and figuring out problems. Our mind is wired to keep going, even when we are sleeping. This space is time for your brain to practice attention by staying steady on the breath. So come on back to your focus point and let the breath keep you sitting in the present.

…

Today I want to ask you, while sitting here in the present moment, to think about how you got here. Take a moment to contemplate the path you’ve been on, the struggles you’ve had, the diagnosis you’ve received, the old life you’re healing from. To get to the place where you have joined me today sitting in your mindfulness spot focusing over and over on training your mind to come back to your breath and body, there was a journey to get here. Something turned you on to meditation, or maybe you still don’t love it, but you do it because you know it’s helpful. Where you’ve been and how you are here now — that is to be celebrated.

…

Now that you’ve imagined that past self and watch yourself coming to who you are today, I want you to place your hope in yourself. Trusting yourself that you are on the right road back to your authentic self. Just like with this practice, you are bringing yourself home over and over again. This feeling, knowing how far you’ve come, this can give you hope that growth is possible and that you are only going to heal more, love yourself more, and continue on this trauma recovery road. You’ve done it this far; have hope that your practices and goals will continue to thrust you forward with momentum. Hope will help you keep coming back to your true self whenever you stray. Hope will give you the energy to push forward even when it’s a dark day. Think on this Hope for a few moments.

…

Coming back to the breath, take one more cleansing breath. If you feel okay to do so, allow a smile to wash over your face.

Congratulate yourself for being hopeful for a healthy future. Let hope guide you in your journey when it’s hard to keep going.

Feel your sit bones on the seat below you. Wiggle your fingers and toes. And when you’re ready, come back to the room and open your eyes.

Enjoy the rest of your hopeful day, and cheers to your hopeful tomorrow.

Mindful Mondays|Week 7: Gratitude

*Author Note* If you prefer to listen or watch instead of or along with -
Check out the YouTube video and/or the Podcast audio.

Take a moment to let your mind know that today you are going to be focusing on gratitude. Allow your mind some space to take that in — even if it’s grumpy, feeling opposed to this, or thinking of it as a chore.

…

Let be whatever is there, whatever comes up. If any resistance did come up for you, ask that resistance if it can step aside just for ten minutes so you can be present in gratitude.

…

Before we begin, settle down into your seat or cushion and feel the earth below supporting you. Trust yourself to listen to your heart today. Close your eyes if that feels safe. See if a small smile can find its way in the corner of your lips. Let’s take a deep breath and let our bottom nuzzle down into our seat. Sit upright with a tall spine without rigidity — alert by relaxed. Now just observe your body for a moment and see if anything comes up for you.

…

If nothing did, that’s okay. If something in your body was giving you a sensation, focus on that for just a few breaths and see if it wants some attention.

…

It’s okay to trust yourself here. This is a safe space — inside your mind, only you know what’s going on. Allow your breath to be calm and flowing freely. See once again if anything is coming up for you.

…

Today isn’t just a gratitude practice. Today I want to practice self-focused gratitude. In your trauma healing journey, learning to trust yourself is a milestone. Listening to your body and staying present in difficult emotions is a big deal. In a moment, I am going to give you a while to find things to be grateful for. However, I want you to try to focus on yourself when you think about these gratitudes. What can you see in yourself, your body, your wisdom, your life, your accomplishments, your choices, your healing, your path for which you can thank yourself. Maybe it’s for doing this meditation or for hearing and paying attention to the sensations in your body a moment ago. Maybe you’ve hit a sobriety milestone that deserves some praise. Maybe you can recognize a boundary you adhered to with a difficult person recently. Maybe you finished a self-help book you had been putting off for a while. Maybe just that your body is here, allowing you to talk to it and celebrate it. If this is too difficult, that’s okay. If self-gratitude is too challenging, just focus on your breath for a few moments. If you are able to allow yourself to focus on your worthiness, think on those things. Allow gratitude to wash over you in a soul-cleansing way.

…

Take a moment to feel how your body feels in this space of focused self-gratefulness. How does it feel to shift your attention inward at your amazing self?

…

Part of our trauma recovery is learning to trust ourselves, hear our body and spirit, focus on our self-care, be kind and loving to ourselves, and truly be thankful for our stamina on this long healing road. In an effort to negate the painful, harsh, untrue words that were spoken and self-beliefs that were formed in our trauma, it’s paramount to affirm our love for ourselves and be thankful to self that we are still here plugging along in this path. I’m grateful you shared this space with me today. I’m honored to have guided you to a place of self-reflective praise. I applaud your self-celebration and encourage you to do it as often as you can. Until next time, keep on loving and caring for yourself.