Mindful Mondays|Week 3: Calm, Cool, Collected

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Today’s meditation can be used as a regular practice or as an emergency timeout to calm during or after a trigger. 

I encourage to sit very comfortably – maybe in your favorite recliner or a sofa.  It’s even appropriate to lay on your back or the fetal position if you are using this in a stressful situation.  Invite your body to stay alert, but to relax down into whatever ground is supporting your weight.  Visualization is helpful in this practice today, so if you can sort through visions in your mind, I welcome you to close your eyes.  If you are activated and need help staying grounded, I welcome you to softly fix your gaze on something nearby you in the room that makes you feel at ease.  This could be a pretty wall color, a picture of someone you love, your pet laying beside you, or your reflection if a mirror is visible to you.  Let’s immediately ask our breath to aid us for the next few minutes by taking three deep breaths in a row.  You want to drink in from your nose as much air fills your belly, ribs, and lungs.  Hold it at the top for just a brief moment before letting it cascade slowly and controlled out from your mouth.  This may look like a count of 3 to inhale and 6 to exhale, with a brief pause in between. 

For those more experienced in breathwork, this could be a deep 6 count inhale, holding for 3-4 counts, followed by a slow 12-15 count decompression exhale. 

Whatever works for you – take three cleansing breaths when you’re ready.

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Now let’s all return to our natural breath and take a moment to focus on our heartbeat.  Can you hear it?  Can you feel it?  Is it beating fast and hard because you are still activated?  Is it finding a calm rhythm from the deep breathing?  If you need, pause this, and redo three more deep cleansing breaths. 

Focus on your belly and ribs expanding.  Focus on your chest rising.  Notice your heart settling into your chest, relaxing the way you settled down into your seat, sofa, bed, or the ground.  Eventually, you want your heart to calm to the point where you don’t actively feel it without touching your chest.  Keep listening.

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Now that you’ve self-soothed with some breaths, focus away from your heartbeat and breathing to allow your eyes to see the object you are gazing at or conjure a picture in your mind if your eyes are closed.  Whatever picture makes you feel calm.  A pretty color, a scene of nature, a pet.  Spend a moment focusing on this mind picture or whatever you are gazing at.  Notice it’s textures, patterns, colors, maybe a scent or a feeling that comes alongside the visual experience.

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Calm, cool, collected is always available to you.  You can calm yourself by grounding into the room that’s present around you or an object you create in your mind.  You can cool a hot temper or an activated nervous system with deep breaths and elongated exhales.  You can collect yourself by taking this time out to ask your thoughts to pause while you focused on deep breathing and then a focal gaze.  You are safe in your hunkered down relaxed pose. 

You can begin to relax your gaze off your focus point and come back fully into the room.  You can open your eyes if you feel ready. 

You have calmed your own racing heart, cooled your stormy insides, and collected your thought pattern.  Congratulate yourself for taking this time out, especially if you used this in a triggering situation. 

Release your attention back to the current space and allow yourself to slowly get up before acclimating back into whatever is next for your day.